英语幽默的演讲稿

要幽默的不用很长2,3分钟就成不要那么俗的我找的很多要不是不好笑就是很多人都听过要点新鲜的

A Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
温馨提示:答案为网友推荐,仅供参考
第1个回答  推荐于2017-12-16
Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.
At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."
它们是从美国直接带来的
一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。

An Alarm Clock
A young man went to a mountain village for his holiday. One night he stayed at a small hotel near a train station.
Before going to bed, he went to the owner of the hotel and said to the old man, “ Excuse me, sir. Will you please wake me up at a quarter to five? I'm going to take the five o'clock train tomorrow morning. ”
“ Oh, sorry, ” the owner said, “ I am afraid I can't. I don't get up that early. ”
The young man started to go back to his room when he stopped and asked, “ Do you have an alarm clock? That would help me. ”
“ Yes, here it is, young man. ”
The young man took the clock happily and thanked the old man. But when he looked at it carefully, there appeared to be something wrong with it.
“ Does it ring on time? ” he asked the old man.
“ Sure! Just shake it when it's time to get up, and it'll ring. ”
一只闹钟
一个年轻人到一个山村去度假。那天夜里,他住宿在火车站附近的一个旅馆里。
上床睡之前,他对旅馆老板——一个老头儿说:“对不起,先生,请问您能在五点差一刻叫醒我吗?我明天早晨要乘五点的火车。”
“哦,很抱歉”,旅馆老板说,“恐怕不行,我不可能起那么早。”
年轻人正想回到房间去,又停住了问:“那你有闹钟吗?或许它能帮助我。”
“我有,给你,年轻人。”
年轻人很高兴地拿了闹钟,谢了老头儿。但当他仔细查看了闹钟后,发现似乎有毛病。
“它能准时闹吗?”他问老头儿。
“那当然!时间一到,你摇一摇,他就会响的。”本回答被网友采纳
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